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By William Sutcliffe

This can be a devastatingly humorous satire most commonly notion of scholar shuttle, and especially the India back-pack path. Dave travels to India with Liz simply because he thinks he could possibly get her into mattress. Liz travels to India with Dave simply because she wishes a better half for her voyage of religious discovery. She loves it. He goals of frosty mornings, pints of lager and eating places the place vegetable curry is just a side-dish...

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T h a t ' s w h a t you're here for. There's no right or w r o n g . ' 'I didn't mean that. I only . ' I s m i r k e d . I'd really g o t under his skin n o w . ' H e s t o o d u p , throwing Oscar and Lucinda ground. ' J u s t g o . ' 'D'you w a n t to . . c o m e with u s ? ' T h e a t m o s p h e r e thickened as we stared at each other, neither of us speaking. 'I'm sorry,' I said. 'I shouldn't have laughed. I m e a n - A sadist's zero-gravity chamber just because I earned the money to c o m e here doesn't m a k e me any better than you.

Have s e x , then miss J a m e s . . ' pathetic piece of gratification for your efforts - if you think 'I love J a m e s . Doesn't that m e a n anything t o y o u ? ' this m e a n s y o u have taken J a m e s ' s p l a c e , then you've got ' N o t much. ' him while you're d o i n g all this stuff with m e . I don't see 'Like w h a t ? ' why y o u can't just a c k n o w l e d g e what's g o i n g on - then, when he gets b a c k , we c a n all return t o n o r m a l . ' 'Like . . like . . everything.

If y o u hadn't been afraid that we were going to m a k e love, y o u wouldn't have h a d to throw them a w a y . ' 'We did not m a k e love, a n d we're never going to. ' 58 can't control everything, you k n o w . If w e try a n d plan anything else we're just going to kill the w h o l e thing d e a d . ' Given that I h a d used the w o r d 'planning' as a e u p h e m i s m Nothing much for sex (possibly a linguistic first), her answer w a s a very b a d sign. 'I'm fed up of planning,' she said, r a m m i n g the m e s s a g e home.

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