Download Bathtub Admirals by Jeff Huber PDF

By Jeff Huber

Within the depraved satirical culture of Joseph Heller and Kurt Vonnegut, the adventures of 2 naval males stick with the US s upward thrust to international dominance as its army burns off extra testosterone, connives to justify its bloated funds, and prepares for the last word problem the conflict on Evil. friends Jack Hogan and Buzz Rucci joined the U.S. military to protect their kingdom, yet they quickly locate themselves serving in a time "play" conflict. Jack's upward thrust within the army is firstly quick as he dazzles the full army along with his awesome approach within the nice substantial Backfire Raid opposed to the Russians, and single-handedly saves the fleet within the nearly nice enormous teach ruin. yet his brilliance and competence foster resentment, and his naval profession is quickly within the doldrums. Buzz isn't any fit for Jack s mind, yet he performs the sport and is familiar with the folly of embarrassing his superiors. unavoidably Jack alienates one too a number of the bath admirals, his profession takes a dive, and his moment marriage is going right into a skid. bored to death he's taking early retirement on the rank of commander, and in a last irony, watches newly put in Admiral Rucci sail into the sundown answerable for his personal fleet. An insider's eye for aspect and authenticity can provide a scathingly humorous indictment of incompetence on the optimum ranks of the military.

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Sample text

He’s on watch, Buzz. Remember? ” “No, I don’t remember. I must have been taking a nap when that happened. No wonder it seems like I haven’t seen him in a month and a half. ” “Only when we turn over the watch, Buzz. That’s what two section duty means. ” “The horror,” Buzz said. “Jack can’t say I didn’t warn him, though. ” “He’s good at driving the ship,” Gary said. ” “I’m sure he took to it like a duck takes to an oil spill,” Buzz said. “Jackie likes to work hard, the dip shit. Work. Shudder.

It’s laundry day, Dog Fart. Please put your putrid clothes out for the coop cleaner to haul away. The room is starting to smell like a backed up head. G. S. Heard about your grandma while you were on watch. Sorry. Jack pulled the shirt shit off his shirt, stripped off his khakis and underwear, wadded them in a ball, stuffed them in his bulging nylon mesh laundry bag, and set the bag in the passageway outside the door. The fresh sheets rasped against his clammy skin. He considered 44 n J E F F H U B E R grabbing his jab slaps and bathrobe and going down the passageway to the officers’ shower.

Buzz turned back to Gary just in time to see him dabbing his napkin against a new trail marker stain on the crotch of his khaki pants. “Hey, Gravy Groin. ” Gary rolled his eyes. Even they were getting fat. “Remarkable, Buzz. ” “Be that way, then,” Buzz said and moped. “Oh, grow up,” Gary said through his last forkful of trail marker. ” “No,” Gary said, wiping his face with his napkin. “But like you said, Jackie’s a big strong boy. I’m sure he’ll do all right. ” “Unlike our pal Jackie, I have no interest in being an admiral.

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